Sunday, 1 November 2015

Weekend Oncalls!!- IaminworkJeremy

Days roll and nights come, winter breeze and sun that's hot,
Weekdays and weekends, the difference that I know not;
For the doctor I am, busy saving lives so,
Bliss in I was, doing the best job on earth, I know.

I do work 24X7 already, Dear Jeremy thinks I don't,
Well! what does he know to be in our shoes, that he won't,
Prioritise that i do, who should I see first,
Lives that we heal while hiding our needs that we must.

Little old lady, who fell off the stairs and broke her hip or
The girl who is so sick, she is scoring NEWS which is way more
Or the young fella who has overdosed and lying in the shiver
And the man who is bleeding everywhere as he has damaged his liver

All of those are mine, and I tend them with care and my heart
Wish my job would be so much easy, if staffing were not always short
Green eyes I do have, when I see others enjoying the weekends
Hardly see my family while trying to meet the ends

I am in work Jeremy, weekends or weekdays,
I don't care that you think saturdays are mondays,
But I do want my pay, coz I have worked very hard so,
And I still do, and always try to be the best I know.


P.C: Thanks Dimple for asking me to write poem and shruthi for the topic!! And Vaidu, next one will be for you!!

Friday, 1 May 2015

Chickenfeed by Minette Walkers: A review

I read Chickenfeed recently as a part of world book night campaign in my local library. Here we are supposed to pick up a book based on the review by others (you wouldn’t know which book it is until you open at home to start reading it). I deliberately picked up a smaller book as I hardly get time to read. I can take ages to finish a novel at times. But this book, luckily, was a quick read, literally!!

It’s a good read, couldn’t put it down at all. One of the very few books I have read in one stretch. I assume it was partly because it was a quick read and the other fact that it was very compelling made it difficult to pause. Although I knew what would happen at the end, even before starting the novel, I would like to think I was in a slightly better position in comprehending what had happened and the reasons behind it.

Minette Walkers has painted a very lucid picture of the character Norman Thorne and Elsie Cameron. Pretty normal sounding guys right? Well, they are!! But, don’t you think it is difficult to define normalcy. The understanding of these two characters is the fundamental basis of this novel. Story flows seamlessly and one would be so absolved in the psyche of the characters. When you are finished, I am sure there will be a can of worms digging in your little brain.

The story is simple- a crime/ suicide? Not sure. It’s a true story that happened many a decades ago in Crowborough in UK. You can easily look up the story online. After reading, this novel actually made me get off my seat and search for the actual story online. Some believe that Norman Thorne is innocent and Elsie was a tad bit crazy (sorry for the choice of words- probably suffering from a mental health disorder which was not accurately diagnosed/ treated). But Some others hold onto their intense belief that Norman Thorne was the killer. I don’t blame either, as they have their own reasons. This is a novel where in the true story is retold by the above characters as protagonists, and this is their story. We wouldn’t probably be able to understand what exactly happened as they both are long dead now. But after finishing the novel, I don’t deny that I sometimes wonder if Norman Thorne’s life was wasted at a young age of 22.

Its very easy to like Norman. What’s not to like in a young 19 yr old, made redundant of a proper job, trying to hold his platform, struggling to set up a career by himself? But there are lots of mistakes he made throughout his short life. Falling in love with Elsie is not one among them. When you have just fallen in love, you don’t realise what kind of personality your loved ones exhibit (in long term). By the time you understand that this relationship is too fragile and worst of all, dangerous to both, it might be too late. Norman had multiple opportunities to break up with Elsie, but he didn’t want a confrontation, he just wanted an easy way out which was agreeing to all her whims. If he couldn’t get out of it in the beginning, it’s obvious that he wouldn’t be able to get out of it later. I don’t understand why he didn’t see that coming. On the rare chance that he had married Elsie, I still think the end would be almost similar (or may be opposite). Will killing chickens all day had filled him with so much apathy towards a living being that he didn’t flinch while cutting her into pieces and then burying her? Or did she turn him into a person who not only didn’t love her, but had lost all respect towards her as a human being? This one fact is not very justifiable if we want to prove him not guilty.

Coming to Elsie, with her possessiveness, mentality of blaming others for her faults, and her constantly fluctuating emotions with threats of self harm, she comes across as overbearing and eccentric. Most of the traits of her character correlates with the Borderline personality disorder. People close to her, especially her parents, could have identified it and possibly sought medical help earlier. I do feel sympathetic towards her, but it’s hard to like her (atleast in the novel). But that doesn’t mean someone could just kill her because of that. People are different and many a times difficult. We always have a choice whether to do what we want to do or not (I stress we do have choice but we choose one decision over the other, influenced by many things- your past, present circumstances, how it would affect your loved ones and so on).I am not saying what happened actually, because I don’t know. This novel doesn’t promise you the truth behind the crime, doesn't tell you who did what(if that's what you are looking for), but it gives an idea, or lets put it this way, It gives a better understanding of the people involved and their circumstances. After all, we are the puppets of our circumstances, right?

P.S: This is only my opinion, and I have the right to my opinion. I am not pointing fingers or making assumptions. If you don’t agree, Please comment in the comment box so we can have a discussion rather than you know?

Sunday, 4 January 2015

Bye-bye 2014 and Hello 2015!!

Well, another year is gone and has brought a new gift packed  365 day book, which we can utilise to our desire. This is the time of year when we tend to reflect about what happened in the last year and what we could have changed, but didn't; what could be improved upon and how we can do it this year, don't we? Yup!! I am doing the same for the last 1 week. I won't tire you with all my past failures and successes, but will leave this post for the plans for this year. I had some resolutions for the year 2012, but didn't follow them through. I didn't have any for 2013, still did few of them without even realising that they were the resolutions of 2012. And so I have  found out that I am rubbish at sticking to my resolutions. Nevertheless, here comes the plans for this new year 2015. These are not just resolutions, but my plans for the next few years and what I need to do from now. I am sharing it here, so that will be one of the reasons I am going to stick to them this year.

I have been doing some research regarding new year resolutions and how to make them so I can stick to them. I have found some good advise on the internet (mainly Addicted to and Ted website). These points are worth taken into consideration.

1) Goals matter- Choose a goal that is important to you rather than an easy win or just because someone else is doing it.
2) Break them- main long term goals, short term goals and daily/weekly goals- and these should be interlinked in a way that daily goals should lead to short term goals and then inturn help you achieve your longterm goals
3) Goals / success criteria have to be clear cut- SMART (Specific, measurable, attainable, reproducible and time bound)
4) Frame your goals positively
5) Visualise yourself succeed
6) Do one at a time
7) Prepare for failure (Nothing wrong in failing occasionally but that should be a stepping stone for the next success than sulking about it and forgetting the whole process)
8) Focus on the process, not the outcome
9) Reward yourself
10) Last but not the least, have fun and know in your heart that you CAN do it.

Lets get to the resolutions then, eh? I have broken them into categories- Career/ work related, Personal and Others, just for sake of ease.


I won't bore you to death with these. I will be succinct. In 3-4 years, I am going to finish my general practice training for which I need to have completed- AKT/ CSA/ Audit (abbreviations are related to my exams). And my weekly goal is- 2 hours for self study, 1 hour for e-portfolio and 1 hour for extras. (Don't have to worry much about them, they will be accomplished without much fuss. I always get them done, trouble is with personal ones)


In the last year I have been through a lot of stress and that has made me less productive, and often I have been resorting to low mood and being frustrated. Overall it has turned me into a 'not so' nice person to be with ( I was once a genuinely nice person, as commented by others). These are some of the lessons I have learnt and will try to put them in everyday and will work towards building a good relationship with myself and others as well.

Be happy- life is short for stress/ vengeance / hatred.
Live in the moment
Be grateful for the things you have in your life
Love all despite their nuances- after all they are human beings
Forgive and forget
Let go of past and make peace with present
Think positively
Patience and kindness is a virtue- speak softly, gently, no point in getting frustrated or angry over things you can't control. (If you can control them, you know what to do)
Beware! children learn from you

These are quite subjective and I will try to keep them in mind every day of my life as I do believe in them. On a bigger note, I have been following lots of motivational websites, Ted talks and I want to consciously live and improve my life. So I am going to follow few of the advise from there.


My biggest challenge is to wake up at 5 am (or 5:30 at the least) and do something productive in the morning. I have always been a night owl, but I think I would benefit from being a morning person. And I have planned the morning with 20-20-20. That is 20 min of exercise/ meditation, 20min of planning for the day and 20 min for motivational reading/ Ted talks.


Again with 20-20-20. 20 min of reading or writing, 20min of To do list for next day and 20 min of general reflection and gratitude.


I hardly write these days, even in my diary, If i get an entry in my diary once a month thats quite significant. I need to write more, even if its about mundane things, its OK. Plan is for 1 article per week (mostly in my diary, so don't be much hopeful of my blog being filled with posts).


I have also lost touch with reading, I have read- 5 books last year which i know is pathetic. It has been very difficult, but we need to make time for what we care. So I have to read 1 book a month and by the end of this year I should have read at least 12 books.



I need to enrol my daughter in swimming classes this year. She will turn 2 this February. She should have been started early, but at least by the end of this year  she should have started the lessons. I think it is one the very essential skills of life.


I have been planning to learn a new language for a while, but didn't take it further. This year I have planned to learn Spanish, websites been looked at, I have bought CD and books and I have a partner in crime. So its fully geared this year. But I do know to start slow. So the first month is to learn 40 words (10 words per week) and then gradually increase. Outcome at the end of the year- I should be able to say simple sentences in Spanish, and be able to understand most of it.


How can I forget health being a doctor? So I have included 20 min exercise/ meditation in the 5 am club, but will also learn Yoga/Zumba this year (I have a partner in crime for this as well, we are fully motivated this year)

So, Here it is 2015 as visualised by me, to be a new and better me. I know there are lots of them and might be difficult to keep all of them going. But I am hopeful. Cheers to 2015 with lots of hopes and faith! Happy new year to all of you!!