Saturday 4 December 2010

Mmmm..... Yummy!!

"How can I put on weight?"
"Try French fries, has loads of calories and fats as well."
Two years ago, one of my friend had adviced me this but, I never tried. Now, looking back I wonder if this is really true. I have my own doubts about this. Seriously! I have been having french fries almost every alternate day since 2-3 months and since 1 month almost each and every day. Its surprising to say I haven't crossed even a pound more than my standard 45( you got it wrong, I m not that slim alright.. Its Kg and not pounds!).

Is there something wrong with the fries which I eat or is it just my genetic component that doesn't allow me to put on weight? I can't fathom though. Whatever it is I don't really bother about anything cuz I just can't stop having them. Hot crispy french fries with tomato ketchup, mmm.. so yummy. Luscious taste, savoring the last bit of them at Mc Donalds, so delightful (getting a bit addicted to Burger king, Mc Donald's and Croft restaurant). I find happiness in such small moments. Forgetting what you are atleast for a while  when you are relishing something that you like, just amazing. My mouth's watering, I wanna have some now.. I have frozen ones in my freezer, can make them in minutes.. So, see you later...

-Sh

P.S: French fries are not good for health, I know.. will try to cut down.

Tuesday 30 November 2010

Cut it out!!

Day by day, stress is building up! New job, new place, new faces( hardest part of all is to remember all my patients faces, cuz they look alike)new expectations, new competitions, after a break of almost 7 months. Though, I had to clear my exams and wait for registration and the job, I can frankly say it was more than a short break. Relaxed a bit more, I guess. Completing a part of my exams during my internship didn't add any big advantage than a shorter break. People usually take more than a year when they transit from India to UK as doctors. In that way I was quite lucky. My stay in UK for 7 months didn't fill me in with confidence which the job as such has done.

Initial periods, I sailed through smoothly as not much was expected from me. Its time I regain my form and get accustomed at the earliest. Meanwhile, the problem with me is technology. I think I am insidiously getting addicted to techie. I have account in around 15 websites, doesn't mean I visit all regularly, doesn't mean all are not needed. About half of them are absolutely necessary, rest half, nevertheless needed, must be used in discretion. This is where I am crossing the line. There are these social network sites and the blogs, which I log into almost daily. I know, its just a sheer waste of time, but I was bit more addicted during the break and its taking its toll now. That was the reason I said I won't take the brand new laptop which kiran had presented me with, cuz its hard to take eyes off the laptop. Eventually I had to(too good an offer to resist).

Started, just to know what others are upto when I flew far away from them, now its gone upto viewing the (stupid) videos, scrolling the photos of others, commenting and chasing the statuses and updates, with no end, nothing much constructive. With working for 5 days continuously, scattered on calls and 16 hrs of weekend travels, life s getting busier and busier. There are new targets set, new things to learn, new system to adjust, new goals to acheive. I am really short of time. I have made resolution that I won't be logging onto these sites, checking on friends/others updates. Exceptions being occasionally like once a month or so. The others are living their life and me my own. It is this which matters at the end. So 'no' to frequent visit to social network sites and blogs. I ll just check them once a while. And now, I ll be signing off the blog...
-Sh.

Monday 22 November 2010

A letter from knowingly unknown

I am heading back, reluctantly (for a short while though). I feel an eerie strangeness about all this. So near yet so far. Just a week or two back I was with you in our small nest, living our life together. But, now I am miles away alone and succumb to the weather I always dreaded (Don’t worry; I have all the precautions taken).


I fully am aware of the day when we had to make another tough decision in our life. Like it or not, ought to make it. You always stood beside my decision, supported me going out of your way. I can never forget that. But, now I reckon is it worth all the sacrifices, all the stresses that we had to go through and still are going through? I don’t think I know the answer yet. Life is taking us in its own course, we have to prioritize our needs and put an end to this before its too late (hope we do).

I wonder how fast the time slips by. Three years… Three long years have passed in such a short while, like a blink. The same three years back, when I met a complete stranger little did I know that I would be blessed with so much love and happiness. How could I? The warmth of your heart, the dearth of your presence lingers around me like in absolution. I am nostalgic about the precious moments we shared, the days we laughed together, days we wept together, little fights we fought, small differences we had, dreams we dreamt together, fantasies we lived together. They are just not memories to remember or to forget, I feel they are intricately embedded in our day to day life.

But, life isn’t so easy. Most of us learn it the hard way. Another day, I am not with you when I am supposed to be. Today is just not another day; it’s the reflection of 365 days of the past year. Although I am not with you in person, I always will be with you mentally, emotionally and psychologically (medicine effect) in the joys and sorrows, with the dawn and dusk, with every twist and turn, life takes us through (for all that I know journey is not smooth enough), until death do us apart.

Sometimes I feel scared to dream big, what if it shatters into pieces in front of my own eyes? Do I have the strength to withstand it? Nevertheless I don’t stop dreaming, do I? We often see couples madly in love before marriage, wanting to do anything and everything for their love and loved ones. What happens to their pledges once they get married? Glad we are not one among them. The main focus of issue is that they take their loved ones for granted after marriage. A relationship rests on the pillars of love, care, trust and respect- mutually given and taken. It’s the intimacy, the little things which brings contentment that matters. It’s the small curve on the face of wife when she sees her husband after an arduous day’s end, the bliss and the glint of appreciation in the eyes of hubby for even a small thing that his wife has put the efforts to do. Everyone knows that whatever it takes, life goes on with or without love, and often they don’t realize is love that makes life beautiful.

Before long, I just want to say the words which I don’t say often than I ought to. And you know those words. I am grateful to god for bestowing me with you. May be there are days when I have hurt you, I didn’t mean to, I will try not to. I know you wouldn’t have these in your mind, but it’s on my part to apologize for all that. I am really sorry for everything. I will try to be better than what I am and what you expect me to be.

Yours always,
Chinnu.
 
P.S: A bit censored though.

Saturday 2 October 2010

Under the sky and above it...


"Roll on, ye stars! exult in youthful prime,
Mark with bright curves the printless steps of time...
Flowers of the sky! ye too to age must yield,
Frail as your silken sisters of the field."
-- Erasmus Darwin (grandfather of the naturalist Charles Darwin)

Last week, I had gone to London with Kiran. He had some exams held in imperial college London in South Kensington. As we had a couple of hours before boarding the train, we thought to have a look around if anythings nearby. Hence, we got into the Science museum which is almost next to the South Kensington tube station exit. Entry is free, only one need to pay for IMAX 3D cinema(can have 2 for 1 offer if travelling to London by train)

Science museum is one of the very exciting places to visit, especially if interested in science. It has fabulous collections of renowned inventions and discoveries. The galleries are very impressive. As we didn’t have much time we just booked the IMAX – HUBBLE 3D.
Amazing, Hubble 3D film was really spectacular. Initially the 3D was quite irksome with flashy pictures so close to the eyes. But once the exact show started, I really started enjoying it. Starting from launching of the Hubble space telescope in 1990 to the servicing missions to the stupendous photos which were taken by the Hubble, its role in expanding the knowledge about the universe, all of it was splendid.

The film mainly concentrated on the servicing mission probably the one in 2008, don’t remember exactly. But it was definitely after the Columbia Disater in 2003 where our Indian born American girl, Kalpana Chawla succumbed in the mission. Narrated by Leonardo de caprio, if not wrong. The anticipation and apprehension of the crew members whilst last minute preparation for flying, the actual take off of the space shuttle, routine inside the shuttle, the big day to meet Hubble, repairing the parts of Hubble, problems and solutions, ultimately the success of the mission in 3D was marvellous. Later there was an introduction sort of the thing into the universe. Starting from our earth, the sun and its planets, , the nearest star, Sirius Major, the Orion and its stars and nebula, origin of new stars and budding solar systems in the nebulae, our milky way, Andromeda, millions of galaxies, and the likes, it takes you through a rollercoaster ride.

Memories came flooding in, good old memories. I wonder how I started liking Astronomy. Was it while I use to sing Twinkle twinkle little star when I was very young, or when I used to spend the nights staring at the millions of stars in the clear sky, or was it when astronomy became part of my studies in high school? Somehow I have always liked astronomy and astrophysics, the latter the less (physics is not my cup of tea though).

Whenever I think of sky and stars, the only person who comes to my mind is Simhadri sir, the person I adore the most. He has a very significant part in improving my knowledge and enhancing my interest in the same. To your surprise, I don’t know what he used to work as. He was husband of Ushadevi miss, who used to teach science in my high school. He used to come to school sometimes to see his wife or pick her up. We, students, used to pester him to take class for us (Hard time getting the classes, which were supposed to take place, cancelled). But he was always ready to teach us what he knows, great inspirer as well. He thought us about the planets, the stars, how to look for them in the sky, when to look, how to recognize. I learnt to identify the Orion constellation with its stars (Regel, Betelguese,etc), Sirius Major and Minor, Ursa Major constellation, the planets like Venus and Mars. They are all my friends now and I do talk to them (Nope, I haven’t lost my mind or have I?). I have great pleasure in showing them to others.

My school also has some role to play. They have taken me to Nehru Planetorium about 4-5 times, to Sir M Vishveshwaraiah museum a couple of times, both in Bangalore( doesn’t mean that I remember much). They had organised sky viewing in school with the help of Nehru planetarium staff. They had mounted a telescope in the terrace of school and we had looked through it the planets like venus, mars, Jupiter with 4 galilean satellites and Saturn, nice experience.

But all the interest started fading when I finished my schooling, as the sources of input were blocked. Though, I read from Britannica encyclopaedias in library during 1st PU, dropped everything when I started 2 PU, succumbing to tight schedule of classes, tuitions and studies. Still wonder why I didn’t take up a career in Astro.. 

Ok guys, Coming back to reality, IMAX was the only thing we could see in detail. The time passed by and we had to leave the science museum. It takes at least a day to completely explore the museum. Anyways I am planning to go back again when possible.


 - S
"For a breeze of morning moves,
         And the planet of love is on high,
Beginning to faint in the light that she loves
         On a bed of daffodil sky,
To faint in the light of the sun she loves,
         To faint in his light, and to die."
-- Tennyson, "Maud"

P S: Thanks to google for the quotes.

Friday 1 October 2010

ವಾಸ್ತವ


ಬದಿಯಲ್ಲಿ ಸಾಲು ಮರಗಳ ನೆರಳು
ನಡುವೆ ಕಾಲುಹಾದಿ, ನೆತ್ತಿಯ ಮೇಲೆ ಮೋಡಗಳ ಇಣುಕಾಟ,
ಮರದ ರೆಂಬೆಗಳ ನಡುವೆ ಜೂಟಾಟ;
ಮಳೆ ಬರುವ ಮುನ್ನ ಮನೆ ಸೇರುವ ತವಕ, ಆಕೆಗೆ
ವರುಣದೇವನ ಮನದಿಚ್ಚೆ ಆಕೆಗೆ ಅರಿವಿಲ್ಲ
ಎಲ್ಲಿಂದಲೋ ಬಂದ ಸಿಡಿಲ ಕಂಪನ,
ಹಿಂದೆಯೇ ಕೋಲ್ಮಿಂಚ ಬಾಣ, ಚಿಟಪಟ ಸದ್ದು,
ತುಂತುರು ಹನಿಗಳು ಆಕಾಶದಿಂದುದುರಿ
ಇಳೆಯ ಬೆರೆಯುತಿದೆ, ಬೆಚ್ಚನೆಯ ಟಾರ್ ರಸ್ತೆಯ ತಣ್ಣಗಾಗಿಸುತಿದೆ
ಮುತ್ತಿನ ಮಣಿಯಂತೆ ಮಿನುಗುತಿಹ ಮಳೆಹನಿಯ ನೋಡುತ್ತ
ಒಂದರೆಕ್ಷಣ ನಿಬ್ಬೆರಗಾಗಿ ನಿಂತಿಹಳು
ಆಕೆಯ ಕಣ್ಣುಗಳಲಿ ಹೇಳಲಾಗದ ಆನಂದ
ಮುಂಗಾರು ಮಳೆಯ ಆಕರ್ಷಣೆಯೇ? ಮತ್ತೆ,
ದೂರದೂರಿನ ಇನಿಯನ ಸವಿನೆನಪೇ?
ತಿಳಿದಿಲ್ಲ ಆಕೆಗೆ, ಆದರೂ ಮನದೊಳಗೊಂದು ಉಲ್ಲಾಸ
ಮಳೆಯ ನಿಶೆಯಲ್ಲಿ ತೊಯ್ದ ಅರಿವೆಯ ಅರಿವಿಲ್ಲ
ಮನಸು ಹೊಂಗನಸ ನೇಯುತಿದೆ, ಭಾವನೆಗಳ ನೂಲಿನಿಂದ
ಈ ಕ್ಷಣ ಕೊನೆಯಾಗದಿರಲೆಂದು ಹಾರೈಸುತಿದೆ ಜೀವ ಒಲವಿನಿಂದ
ಆಗಲೇ ಮೊಳಗಿತ್ತು ಗುಡುಗು ಸಿಡಿಲಿನ ಆರ್ಭಟ,
ಆಕೆಗೆ ಅಸ್ತಿತ್ವದ ಅರಿವು ಮೂಡಿಸುತ್ತ;
ಕಲ್ಪನೆಯು ಬರಿಯ ಭ್ರಮೆಯಾಗಿತ್ತು,
ಕನಸು ನನಸಾಗದೇ ಕೊನೆಯಾಗುತ್ತ...
-ಶ್

Monday 20 September 2010

ನೆನಪು

ನಿನ್ನ ನೆನಪೇ ಹಾಗೆ,
ಮುಂಜಾನೆಯ ಮಂಜಿನ ಮುಸುಕಿನ ಹಾಗೆ,
ಇರುಳಲಿ ಕಾಡುವ ಕನಸಿನ ಹಾಗೆ,
ಚಿಗುರೆಲೆಯ ಅಪ್ಪಿದ ಇಬ್ಬನಿಯ ಹಾಗೆ,
ಮೊದಲ ಮಳೆಯು ಇಳೆಯ ಚುಂಬಿಸಿದ ಹಾಗೆ;
ಆ ಸವಿಚುಂಬನಕಾಗಿ  ಹಾತೊರೆವ ನವಿಲಂತೆ ನಾನು
ನೀ ಬರುವ ಹಾದಿಯ ಕಾದಿರುವೆ, ಗರಿಬಿಚ್ಚಿ
ತಂಗಾಳಿಯ ಅಲೆದಾಟಕೆ ಮುಂಗುರುಳು ನಲಿದಾಡುವಾಗ,
ಎಲ್ಲೋ ಮರೆತ ಪಲ್ಲವಿಯ ಗುನುಗುನಿಸುವಾಗ,
ಸ್ಮೃತಿಪಟಲದೊಳಡಗಿದ ಭಾವಗಳ ಹೆಕ್ಕಿ ತರುವಾಗ,
ನಿನ್ನ ಅಸ್ತಿತ್ವದ, ನಿನ್ನ ಸಾಮೀಪ್ಯದ, ಆ ನಿನ್ನ ಸಾನಿಧ್ಯದ ನೆನಪು.
ಚುಮುಚುಮು ಚಳಿಯಲಿ ಬೆಚ್ಚಗಿನ ಅನುಭವ
ತಪಸ್ವಿನಿಯ ತಪೋಗಾಥೆಯಂಥ ಅನುಭಾವ:
ಬಾಗಿಲೊಳು ನಳನಳಿಸಿಹ  ಹಸಿರು ತೋರಣ
ಕೂಗಿ ಕರೆದಿದೆ ನಿನ್ನ, ಬರುವೆ ಎಂದೋ ನೀನು?
ನನ್ನ ಮನವ ತುಂಬಲು, ನನ್ನೆದೆಯ ಮನೆಯ ತುಂಬಲು
ಕಾಯುತಿದೆ ಜೀವ, ಆಸೆಯೆಂಬ ಹೊರೆಯ ಹೊತ್ತು
ಕಾಡಬೇಡ ಇನ್ನು, ಒಮ್ಮೆ ಬಂದು ಬಿಡು
ಕನಸಿನಲ್ಲಾದರೂ  ಬಂದು ನನ್ನ ಜೊತೆಗೂಡು...

Saturday 18 September 2010

Beyond the pale


I watched a movie last night. Couldn’t wait to post a blog about it. The movie name is `Rann’ starring Amitabh Bachchan, Ritesh Deshmukh, Paresh Rawal, Sudeep (kannada actor- thats the main reason I watched this movie) Hadn’t heard about this movie at all. Its theme is based on media especially the news channels.

Its about a news channel, India 24/7 headed by Vijay Harshwardhan Mallik (Amitabh Bachchan) , a renowned reporter and writer. He is a kind of person with insight and adhere to principles and values. His son, Jay Mallik (Sudeep), I think is different, is quite a character. In my opinion, he must be in a dilemma, to choose between being practical and value the principles. I ll tell you some more about him at the end. The TRP rate of India 24/7 will be falling, mainly because of a tough competitor,Headlines24, headed by  Amrish Kakkar. Amrish was an ex-employee of India 24/7, left that and had started a new channel.

Main story begins with an incident, Bomb blast, making headlines, starting a war of words between the ruling(Hooda- good one) and the opposition party leaders(Pandey- bad one) and later turns out into bloodshed. Pandey and Naveen, Jay’s bro-in-law, a businessman, manipulate the incident so as to blame Hooda for the bomb blast. They lure Jay to plan a plot against Hooda, in return promises good TRP and lots of money. A video was recorded by threatening 2 people to say that they are witnesses and the blast was done by Hooda and the two will be killed later. Jay convinces his father using the CD that Hooda is bad and this will be telecasted. Everything starts to fall in place and all is well until the truth is found out by the hero, Purab Shastry ( Ritesh Deshmukh). He is a new recruit in India 24/7, an ardent believer of Vijay mallik, respects him a lot. In every crime, no matter how clever the criminal is, he ll leave some clues. Purab catches on those clues and finally unveils the truth. But he is confused, doesn’t know whom he should be telling all these. If he ever says to Vijay he might cover up as it involves his son. So, he decides to meet Amrish of Headlines 24 and gives the cd's which are the witnesses to the truth, to him. But Amrish instead of telecasting them, he blackmails Pandey and ask for 500 crores. Purab finds out about this. His trust in media is shattered to pieces. Finally, he decides to give the cd's to Vijay and let him do whatever he wants with it. Ultimately, Vijay who thinks values are greater than family, telecasts the cd's on his channel. Story ends with Jay commiting suicide and Pandey, Naveen and Amrish are brought into the court for trial.

In the movie, Jay appears to have a very weak personality. He is not able to judge what is right and what’s wrong, lacks the ability for sound judgement, is easily influenced by other people. At the end, though he kinda realizes his mistake, he cannot face the truth, hence commits suicide. He could have been changed easily, but the harder part is to change the others who don’t even have little bit of regret. People have so much of faith in the media, they convey truth to the people, they are here to support the good and oppose the bad. I don’t know if something like this could really happen, because I always thought people working in media have conscience, integrity and they value the principles and morals. If it does happen, its a shame, people will stop trusting the media and politicians. These things happen only when a person is ready to do anything to succeed in life, and the success is often measured in terms of power, money and material things. The real success is within the heart of the person. The solution is not as simple as it might appear. People have to change for the good, they have to realize that rightfulness, honesty, integrity, morals and ethics are more than anything in life. They all should imbibe these qualities and put a decent effort to become good human beings.

Almost the same views are reflected in Peepli, live. Its based on farmer’s suicide. The director has criticized the business-minded media people and the mindless, corrupt politicians. It shows that media, just makes and telecast the news, but little it does to help the situation. All are busy big time chasing fame, publicity and money. I do hope that the media is not like this in reality, although I cannot say so in case of politics...

-S




"Whilst all the world is in pursuit of power, culture corrects the theory of success."
"I fear the popular notion of success stands in direct opposition in all points to the real and wholesome success. One adores public opinion, the other, private opinion; one, fame, the other, desert; one, feats, the other, humility; one, lucre, the other, love; one, monopoly, and the other, hospitality of mind."
-Ralph Waldo Emerson


 

Thursday 16 September 2010

The other side...

‘Yet another day and I ll be gone’, she said to herself as she emerged out of the office and the door slammed behind her. Walking down the street fraught with people, she thought of what Jack had told her last month. But that was a month back. After that he had never called her. In an attempt not to think about it, she started looking at the people in the street, scrutinizing them, trying to explore a new meaning out of their blank faces.


It was a fine December evening.The entire city was festooned with lights on the Christmas eve. Cold wind was blowing on her face. She thanked the fur coat which helped her ward off the chill, otherwise she would have frozen. The crowd swarmed across the streets hastily to reach their cozy homes at the earliest. Yet she was in no hurry to reach her apartment which was just a block away.


Sauntering at her own pace she walked past the library which used to give her refuge when she needed the most. She thought of those days which used to haunt her day and night. During that time she would flee into the library and get herself engrossed in a book. That was past. Life has thought me lessons, given me strength to face the truth. This is not the end of the road. This will pass by, she thought.


She reached her apartment. Closing the door, she switched on the light. Realising there is no power, she lit up two vanilla candles, Jack’s favourite ones. Long time since he came to her apartment. So happy she was with him. She laid down on her bed and her memory slowly drifted back to her past, her childhood days. She was always a happy child until her father moved away from her life. Her mother couldn’t cope with it. After few years she passed away. And she was left all alone. Her life was filled with misery and melancholy. 

That was when jack had entered her life, bestowing her with a ray of hope. But now, what was happening? The only thing she dreaded was about to happen. Is he going to desert her the way her father abandoned her? Tears rolled down her cheek. Without knowing she drifted into slumber.


Amidst the woods, she was striding aimlessly. Every second her panic grew more and more. She was daunt with the wilderness, petrified by the scowls and howls of the inhabitants of the jungle which kept reverberating in her ears. There was no way she could get out of there. Every path seemed alike. It was kind of labyrinth whose complexity increased every time she tried to solve it. Desperate for life, she looked up the cloudy sky and prayed to god to rescue her from the terror-stricken place. At that moment, like a miracle, there was a silver lining which shone at the edge of the cloud. All of a sudden she got up from her bed, with a gasp, trying to remember the dream.


Her cell phone was ringing. As an impulse, she took the phone. Yes, its Jack, bless him, she whispered to herself. A smile grew on her sullen face as she spoke. Yes, there is a silver lining, definitely there is...


-Shwetha


Lead, kindly Light, amid th'encircling gloom,
Lead Thou me on;
The night is dark, and I am far from home;
Lead Thou me on.
Keep Thou my feet; I do not ask to see
The distant scene one step enough for me.


I was not ever thus, nor prayed that Thou
Shouldst lead me on;
I loved to choose and see my path; but now
Lead Thou me on.
I loved the garish day, and spite of fears,           
Pride ruled my will: Remember not past years.


So long Thy pow'r has blest me, sure it still
Will lead me on
O'er moor and fen, o'er crag and torrent, till
The night is gone.
And with the morn those angel faces smile,
Which I have loved long since, and lost awhile.


-John Henry Newman